Got Milk?

I learned something new today. Our 14-year-old son, Zac, just informed me that powdered milk comes from squeezing old women's breasts.

Leftovers 2012 A.D.

This morning, I (age 52) asked, "Are you eating Jon's breakfast?"

Monique (age 52) answered, "The breakfast I made him yesterday? Yes."

Monique had placed the plate in the refrigerator when Jon said he'd eat it later. Apparently, our son forgot about the meal Monique had made him. So, my wife was eating day-old scrabbled eggs and toast reheated in the microwave. Yuck. 

I looked at Zac (age 14) and said, "Mom and I don't throw away food because we grew up during the Great Depression."

Parenthood Is...

Parenthood is having a son standing behind a closed door and explaining in lengthy detail why he'd like to have a few friends over while I'm on the other side of that same closed door asking if he'd please friggin' wait until I'm done using the toilet.

BOOK REVIEW: We're Off To See The Shivers

(Originally published 2010, Paperback edition 334 pages)

Mr. Bennett's novel starts off very effectively. Hobos in the pursuit of a serial killer during the Great Depression is a wonderful, dark premise. The main protagonist, Marcus Connelly, is driven by revenge for the murder of his young daughter, Molly. He meets up with other victims of the so-called Mr. Shivers and they form a loose alliance in their search for the illusive murderer. During their journey across the Midwest, they meet many hardships and have plenty of time to contemplate the nature of right and wrong. The various hobos are given opportunities to choose a different, happier path and quit their pursuit.

What works very well in the beginning and through most of the book is the focus on the hobos' troubles and ruminations. A tension weaves throughout the book because the indefinable Mr. Shivers rarely appears and usually only from a distance. You know the dude is bad news and dangerous. The hobos outnumber Mr. Shivers, but you still feel the serial murderer always has the upper hand. However, I agree with many of the other Amazon reviewers that the ending falls apart. It is an interesting, surreal twist, but is at odds with the rest of the very human story. Mr. Bennett may have done a better service by keeping the story grounded more in reality.

(Meyers - A few years ago, I started writing, under the pseudonym Franklin the Mouse, short reviews at Amazon's web site. This is my most recent review #324)

BOOK REVIEW: "An Instinct For Suicide"

(Originally published 1973; Paperback edition 391 pages)

While attending the 1972 Democratic Convention, New York City Mayor John Lindsay watched the comedy of errors around him and stated, "This party seems to have an instinct for suicide." Theodore White clearly shows how the Nixon and McGovern operations were leagues apart in preparation and effectiveness. President Nixon's team was an organized, multipronged attack machine. Senator McGovern's campaign staff was the gang that couldn't shoot straight. A very accurate statement by Mr. White describes the situation going into the presidential campaign, "Mr. McGovern persisted in the Lincolnian tradition of hoping to the better angels of people's nature might summon them to new visions; Mr. Nixon proposed to deal with Americans as they are." This philosophy pretty much in a nutshell set up President Nixon for a near-record-breaking win.

The two issues I have with the late Mr. White's book is he gives scant time to the effects of Governor Wallace's campaign as well as the assassination attempt on the little, Georgian bigot's life and the author's coverage of Watergate is incomplete due to the publishing deadline for the book. The work does, however, cover some interesting ground such as the implosion of Senator Muskie's campaign; the 1970 U.S. Census; race; Baby Boomers; the proliferation of shopping malls; the Thomas Eagleton debacle and frantic search for a VP replacement; and President Nixon's and the liberal presses' mutual, destructive animosity.

It was somewhat freaky that while I was in the middle of reading Mr. White's fourth and last book in his "The Making of the President" series, Senator McGovern died at the age of 90. I know it isn't kosher to speak ill of the dead, but the late Senator ran an extremely terrible campaign; staffed by mostly young zealots who wouldn't have noticed a good idea if it came up and bit them in the backside. The enigma known as the late President Nixon is treated much too kindly considering what came to light after the book was published. Overall, "The Making of the President 1972" has less vim and vigor than the three previous installments. Mr. White, as usual, still displays a mastery of language but the book I found quite depressing and incomplete.

(Meyers - A few years ago, I started writing, under the pseudonym Franklin the Mouse, short reviews at Amazon's web site. This is my most recent review #323)

BOOK REVIEW: Tumorville Tour Guide

(Originally published 2012, Hardcover edition 111 pages)

Without Mr. Hitchens ability to speak or write, he felt empty. The esophageal cancer eventually took away his ability to rhapsodize to his admirers and detractors, but left the curmudgeon his funny, acerbic and always illuminating pen. In this short memoir about his diagnosis and certain death to come, Mr. Hitchens refused to go gently into that good night without a few good parting shots. The outspoken atheist covers such topics as religious zealots who are tickled pink that he has cancer; the illogical nature of prayers; hilarious cancer treatment advice; the joy of public speaking and basically how medical treatments as well as his rapidly deteriorating body sucked big time.

Without question, Mr. Hitchens was one of the late Twentieth and early Twenty-first Century's great writers and speakers. Much like H.L. Mencken's work, I did not agree with some of his stances, but I was always entertained by his ability to write wonderful, playful, erudite lines. The afterword by his surviving wife, Carol Blue, was an added bonus. This little, 111-page compendium was a pure joy. Any guy that can have me smiling and burst out laughing about cancer couldn't have been all that bad.

 

(Meyers - A few years ago, I started writing, under the pseudonym Franklin the Mouse, short reviews at Amazon's web site. This is my most recent review #322)

BOOK REVIEW: Nazi Necromancer

(Originally published 2011, Mass Market Paperback edition 539 pages)

Mr. Del Toro's and Mr. Hogan's first book in this trilogy, "The Strain," was truly scary. The intensity of people being confronted and killed by actual vampires made the novel a constant horror maze of thrills and chills. The second book, "The Fall," was more of an action/adventure/mystery with a sprinkling of scary moments. "The Night Eternal," however, is another matter. It is far removed from the goosebump feel of the first novel. Two years have past since the conclusion of the second book. The main protagonists, who are in hiding, are barely scraping by and the head vampire known as The Master is reining over his earthly domain. It's an apartheid system in which humans get the short end of the deal. There are concentration camps and everything about the gloomy, nearly-eternal-night environment is run with Nazi precision.

The vampires, who were so damn frightening in "The Strain," are relegated to a supporting cast role in this baby. Think of them as the Orcs in Peter Jackson's "Lord of the Rings" movie trilogy. Despite having superior speed, strength, agility and a nasty, bloodsucking weapon, they drop like friggin' flies when combatting the heroes of the book. I kept rolling my eyes because the vampires were never able to lay even one measly scratch on the humans. The scenarios in "The Strain" seemed almost plausible thus darned right scary. "The Night Eternal", on the other hand, comes across as a blending of "Lord of the Rings" and an Indiana Jones' film. The story also has strong biblical connections that should give any Goth Christians out there an orgasm.

Overall, the trilogy was inconsistent in its delivery. Readers who were hoping for a cornucopia of horror will likely be sorely disappointed in the second and third installments. They were entertaining reads, but devolved into a formulaic, spiritual adventure.

 

(Meyers - A few years ago, I started writing, under the pseudonym Franklin the Mouse, short reviews at Amazon's web site. This is my most recent review #321)

BOOK REVIEW: Out Of The Frying Pan And Into The Fire

(Originally published 2010, Mass Market Paperback 440 pages)

Mr. Del Toro's and Mr. Hogan's second book in their vampire trilogy guides are heroes from a bad situation to even worse. While the first novel, The Strain, was scarier than this sequel, I believe it has to do with the reader becoming inured to legions of vampires attacking people. There are some scary moments, but not anywhere near the level as the first book. Also, the ease in which the protagonists kill hordes of the bloodsuckers without the good guys receiving even one scratch has the same feel as a Star Wars film where bullets are flying all over the friggin' place but never seem to hit the heroes. The Strain went into deep detail about how being bitten and transformed into a vampire evolved. The Fall is more of an action/adventure work. But, mercy, what a fun ride. There are plenty of exciting twists and turns in the story. Some details from the first book are answered and new mysteries arise that will only be revealed in the third installment. This is not a stand-alone work and it is necessary to read the first book to grasp what the hell is going on. I found it to be an enjoyable, easy read and look forward to diving into the last novel The Night Eternal. At this point, it doesn't matter if the concluding book is scary or not. I am very curious as to how or IF the authors resolve this whole mess in a satisfactory manner. 

(Meyers - A few years ago, I started writing, under the pseudonym Franklin the Mouse, short reviews at Amazon's web site. This is my most recent review #320)

BOOK REVIEW: One Hell Of A Hickey

(Originally published 2009, Mass Market Paperback 585 pages)

Mr. Del Toro and Mr. Hogan have reinvented the vampire myth with some impressive upgrades. The fangs are jettisoned for something far worse. In keeping with our more science-based view of the world and much like the evolution of most new zombie stories, the authors' vampires are created by a pathogen and a twist of dark magic. The book is a mixture of horror, mystery and action. I also enjoyed that they interspersed trivia about such things as the nature of pathogens, rats and New York City.

As the late, great director Alfred Hitchcock said, "There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it." So naturally, the mysterious, instantaneous death of all the passengers on the Boeing 777, keeps the reader on edge. You don't know what the heck is going on and that in itself freaks you out for the first few hundred pages or so. As the story moves along and you get a better understanding of what is occurring, it becomes more of an action adventure. However, Mr. Del Toro and Mr. Hogan serve up plenty of scary scenes throughout the book which kept my sphincter muscle puckered up nice and tight. New York City and its creepy subterranean network are a great choice for the story's location.

The first book in this trilogy ends with the reader understanding who are the key players, some of the threats still ahead as well as a good dollop of mysteries unanswered. My guess is the second book will have more of an action/adventure feel to it than a horror story. Mr. Del Torro & Mr. Hogan have written a solid, highly entertaining tale that was well worth reading.

(Meyers - A few years ago, I started writing, under the pseudonym Franklin the Mouse, short reviews at Amazon's web site. This is my most recent review #319)